This morning I had a revelation while talking with my 8 yr old Storm Queen. She and I have been having lots of battles this year, and I've been really struggling trying to find what the problem is. This morning I think I found the root of it all. We had just finished devotions which was about recognizing God's gifts in ourselves, and she began by saying that she had none. During the next few minutes of asking her to really think and name some positive gifts, she DID manage to name a few, but even then they were prefaced in a negative way. I realized that right now my little Storm Queen has VERY little self esteem....she can easily rattle off any number of things she does wrong, but ask her to name 2-3 things she does well and she goes cold. I sat there pondering during her math as to what maybe I've done or failed to do in creating this lack, and I wonder if my need to control doesn't stifle some of her growth in this area. My goal for the next few weeks is to really step back and try some positive reinforcement of her gifts at any possible chance.
Tonight while putting her to bed I asked her to name three GOOD things she did today. It took awhile, and one of them was a LITTLE thing, but she did it. We once again focussed on how God doesn't make junk, and how He's given her some special gifts. My "quest" in the coming month is to help her really discern for herself what some of those are!